Just a quick little note here. I have decided that with everything going on. Being married, buying a house, etc, I would start a new chapter with a new blog.
Find me here.
Just a quick little note here. I have decided that with everything going on. Being married, buying a house, etc, I would start a new chapter with a new blog.
Find me here.
I’ve been getting excited about moving (I really need to slow down until we sign more papers-but I can’t), and I’ve been imaging all the way we can make the front of the house (as well as the back deck) pretty and inviting. I have been trying to make sure I can keep something alive before we spend money on any plants. I mean, there’s no use if I am just going to kill them.
These little daisies are doing just fine though. Green and growing fast. Soon, I’ll have to transfer them into a bigger pot, but for now they are okay in this smaller pot. Seeing them grow and watching them change has me wanting to get more. Nobody can really have too many daisies, right?
It has been too quiet around here, I know, but life is moving along even though I haven’t been good at keeping track of it here.
And sadly, it probably won’t change for a few weeks. Life will be busy, and this blog will be quiet.
The wedding went perfectly (even with a few imperfections) and we are blissfully married. I have a husband! My dad was able to be there, and he rocked until almost 10 o’clock. If he was tired at all, he didn’t let on. It meant a lot to Greg and I both that he was feeling well enough to be there for us.
Now, we are closing in on a home. I will talk more about it later and the decision to not build like we had planned, in a more lengthy and probably picture-heavy post, but we found one that fits us and our needs/wants. Our bid went in yesterday, and we are confident that it is going to be ours. I have already started decorating it in my head. I know that a lot of you women reading this get what I am talking about.
Hopefully things continue to go smoothly and I can be back on a more regular basis soon!
Life around here has been non-stop stress for the past two weeks. Between finding out about Dad’s cancer and work, I’m finishing up the little things for the wedding that is happening in ONE WEEK. I cannot believe it is here already. The jars have been tied with lace ribbon, and I finally picked out a pretty pale pink nail polish. The little details.
Dad is doing a little better. He started radiation on Thursday and is handling it well. No nausea (knock on wood) and no headaches. He has a better appetite, and we are pretty sure we have his pain under control. It’s still up in the air as to how things will go when he gets further into the radiation and then chemo, but we are hopeful that things will stay calm and there will be no setbacks.
If things get quiet around here for a while, don’t be alarmed. Greg will probably be going to Indianapolis sometime after our wedding for work (hail!) so I am going to soak up as many minutes with him as I can. I will be back eventually.
This is a tough post to write, a tough post to back over everything that has happened in the last week and put it into writing. But here it is.
My dad was diagnosed last Friday with Stage 4 Small Cell Lung Cancer. He has been getting sick for a few weeks, slowly getting weaker and more tired, but we all thought that he had developed pneumonia as a result of a long winter and his emphysema. He and my mom called the ambulance Thursday morning, and after x-rays, it was determined that yes, he did have pneumonia. But there were also shadows in his lung that were concerning to the doctor.
I had myself convinced that it was scar tissue, nothing more than something to do with his emphysema and the things that come with it. After a multitude of blood tests, scans, and x-rays, I was wrong.
The cancer is very aggressive and has spread to his liver, brain, and lymph nodes. One round of chemo was given on Wednesday, and he will start radiation on Tuesday. After two weeks, we will figure out what the plan is. More chemo or not. I have hope that this is going to work, and while it isn’t going to take the cancer away, it will slow its growth and allow us more time with him. Hope.
He is home with us right now (we brought him home Friday), and he are working to keep his pain medicines on schedules and breathing treatments coming when he feels short of breath.
In two weeks, I will be getting married to the love of my life, and my dad will be at home watching via Facetime. It’s not the ideal situation, one that will probably make me bawl my eyes out more than once on our wedding day, but it is what he wants to do. He wants to see me get married but not worry about people around getting him anxious or upset. It will work.
“Hope. It is the only thing stronger than fear.”
I have tried a lot of different post planners in my years as a blogger. Some work well for me, some don’t. I think it all depends on lifestle really, and whether someone is more paper-oriented (me) or technology-oriented (semi-me). I try to make myself put more use into apps on my phone so that I can have everything available at all times, but it never lasts long. I am always making to-do lists and blog ideas on scraps of paper or Post-It notes.
I designed this one so that it will fit nicely in my large Moleskine planner without hanging out over the edges, plus I wanted a size that I could pop into my printer without cutting (one of my least favorite parts of paper projects). I bought 5×8 large index cards at my local office supply store, and adjusted my page setup in Adobe, and printed a stack in less than 5 minutes. And to save paper, I flipped them over and printed again. 2 blog posts on one piece of paper.
I always carry a few blank ones with me in my planner as well as ones that I am already working on. I take down points and links I want to include and any specific pictures that I know I will want. Easy peasy.
If you’d like to download a copy for yourself, the link is below for a PDF version.
My eyes float along
the gray in the distance,
where trees meet sky,
searching for some small spot of light
among such dense clouds.
Paintbrushed wisps of wind
make the prettiest pictures
but it is the sunshine underneath
buried by soft suede
that I want playing on my skin.
I have been bad at documenting my Project Life this year so, haven’t I? If it wasn’t so super busy, I might be a little more caught up on here, but at the time, I am doing my best.
I still love this project, even though it can be a bit daunting to stay caught up. The two weeks per spread is still working well for that, and I have been able to incorporate versatile inserts still. Love that part.
My PL is mostly photo-heavy, as you can see, but I do like to add simple embellishments too. I am loving the Amy Tangerine thickers, mainly because I can make them any color I want with a little bit of nail polish. Crafty stuff, that nail polish is.
I managed to survive this crazybus week with nothing more than a few hours less sleep. I got my new manual chair and plan a mini-shopping excursion in KC before we headed out for Oklahoma. That Friday was a good day (besides Sean knocking himself out. That part I could have done without).
This past week was supposed to be about relaxing, but it turned out to be busy too. And that’s okay. The next month of my life will probably have no no NO relaxing. At some point, I might get used to it.
Well, my bridal shower didn’t go exactly as planned, thanks to the snow. We woke up this morning to almost 8 inches of ugly snow (according to the airport readings), and knowing that a lot of people coming today would be driving an hour, we decided that the best thing to do was just cancel it. I really don’t want it on my conscience if someone would have car trouble or, worse, get in a wreck, just trying to get to my shower.
We were predicted to get ice and snow, but really, if you’re from Kansas, you know you don’t believe anything the weatherman says until it is on the ground.
It’s been a rough winter for us. Between the now three big snows that we have had, I think we are probably breaking some kind of snowfall records. I think even the snow-lovers are sick and tired of it. I for sure am.
So today, I am lounging again, I guess. I am going to work on our honeymoon minibook and maybe get a little organizing done. And I am going to wait on spring.
+ loving: that it is Friday. This week has gone much faster than last week.
+ reading: Divergent. I’m trying to find time to really get into it. It’s not working.
+ listening to: A lot of Spotify. My offline playlist is so mixed! I love it.
+ eating: Almonds. Yummy, good fat.
+ drinking: Water. I have been drinking too much Dr Pepper this week.
+ planning: A honeymoon mini book. Gray chevron pages like our envelope liners. (I seem like I live my life paper project to paper project, huh?) And a new painting for my office at work. It needs some spunk.
+ missing: my engagement ring. It’s at the jeweler’s getting sized with my band (which I am equally in love with), and I feel off balance without it.
+ enjoying: the fact that my hair feels healthy again after getting it cut. Amazing what 2 inches off can do. (I can’t wait til after the wedding so I can cut 3 more inches off!)
+ craving: Panera Bread.
+ seeing: A messy desk. I must clean it before I leave today.
+ wishing: The next 36 days would go without incident. Let’s go, Wedding Day!
When unimportant things somehow become priority, other things are lost. My photography, my soul’s simple way of telling a story through my favorite aperture blur, has for too long been ignored, in the most devastating way. So many times I have intended to hook my camera around my neck and head toward the sunshine I love so much, and so many times, I do not. I feel stationary.
It’s beginning to be taxing on me, my heart. I forgot, or perhaps never paid attention to how much my creativity, or lack thereof, directly influences my mood, and in turn, all other things in my life.
With spring coming, I can taste the soothing light that will finally calm the photo itch.
And I welcome it, smiling.
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The RSVPS are coming in! My favorite are the ones that have cute little notes written on them.
Silly me, I forgot to leave a spot for the names on the actual card, or at least make it clear that the names might be useful on the envelope. I have a bunch that are blank, so I know how many people are coming, just don’t know who. Oh well, it’ll be a surprise I suppose!
Even with the parade of yellow happening through this house, it is still my favorite color. And definitely the right color for our wedding. It is fantastically us.
Only 38 days to go! We are still working away, and I am about to get into crazy-craft-making mode to make sure that jars are decorated and frames are painted. And I have to order the lace for the tables. And, and, and. Still so much to do, but I am chugging through.
I am allowed to have weak moments and cry for no reason.
I am allowed to be happy too.
I am allowed to lazy and hang out in my PJs all day.
I am allowed to want.
I am allowed to allowed to be angry.
I am allowed to feel beautiful.
I am allowed to hold big dreams in the palms of my hands & not know what to do with them.
I am allowed to change, if the changes are for the good.
I am allowed to allowed to display my inner nerd at times.
I am allowed to make my own decisions.
I am allowed to be by myself in the quiet for a while.
I am allowed to feel worthy.
I am allowed to love. And be loved. With all of my heart.
We arrived on Friday night and decided to do a little bit of night riding before heading in to sleep. Not even 30 minutes later, we were calling 911 for Shawn, who flipped his RZR and knocked himself out. Cold. Limp. Scary. After a trip to the ER, x-rays and 4 stitches just under his right eyebrow, he was fine, just sore. It definitely shook everyone up, and it made us all more aware of our harnesses and helmets. There’s no such thing as too cautious, I guess.
Saturday was packed full of people. I’ve never seen so many people in one place watching others ride. I would easily say there were over 1,000 RZRs, Wildcats, Jeeps, ATVs, and buggies there. Kelly rolled his RZR on the same hill that Shawn did, and later that day, JD did too. They both were fine and kept riding (after fixing a few things anyway).
Travis has some videos posted on his YouTube channel. Check it out.
Already looking forward to next year.
Lately, I’ve been feeling very motivated and inspired to design. Everything. I have sketches for stamps and cards and baby announcements (not mine!) and birthday invitations. I have ideas and colors picked out for most of them too.
I get on these spurts where my brain is so overflowing with ideas that I can hardly get them onto the blank page fast enough. They are just there.
New stamps are going to be ready in early May probably. I am not putting any more pressure on myself than I need before and immediately after our wedding. So they’ll have to wait until I am ready to get back to real life.
+ It fits me. When I was injured (almost 10 years ago!), my dad’s insurance didn’t really want to help with equipment. I guess they thought that paying my medical bills for 4+ months was enough. So the manual wheelchair that I had was one that was donated to me from Craig Hospital. And it didn’t really fit me very well. I used it and made due, but it wasn’t right for me. This one is fit for me though.
+ All over flat black. 14 tiny inches wide. NaturalFit hand rims. Between the narrowness and the shape of the hand rim, it is a million times easier to push (although some grip on the hand rims will probably be something I will be adding). I didn’t really think much of pushing around a chair that was 18 inches wide, but looking now at my old chair, it was a tad bit ridiculous. My arms weren’t made for that.
+ New back. Comfortable, shorter, and more contoured.
I first saw the 12 on 12 on Dear Lizzy’s blog, and of course, what’s a better excuse to snap random photos of my day without any pressure? Such a good idea. Good job, Lizzy girl.
Yesterday was a good day. My new manual wheelchair finally arrived, and it fits like a dream. Much, much, much better than my old manual chair. Probably because it is 4 inches narrower and has wheels that work well with my hands. Anyone who uses a wheelchair for daily living can understand just how important it is to be both comfortable and functional in your chair. While I do have to get used to this chair, I think it is going to work well for me. *fingers crossed*
Work was pretty normal. Nothing new there.
I had dinner with Maria, and we discussed all the things that best friends discuss. Our relationships, work, my wedding, her schooling, just life in general. We both needed a good girl dinner, I think.
I managed to get some Project Life time in after dinner. Another stress-reliever. I am really liking the one-side-of-a-spread-per-week format that I have been using. It takes so much pressure off of me to “fill up” the pockets with things that do not really matter or need to be shown. Plus I can use more inserts, which I love. Especially coin pocket inserts. Who knew 2×2 photos could be so cute?
I am thinking that 12 on 12 will be a monthly thing for me. It was such fun this time, and a good alternative to Day in the Life, which for some odd, unknown reason sort of overwhelms me.
when my hand catches
the right light
and the diamonds are all
I smile and sigh
and quietly thank God that
you chose me.
It’s no secret that Pride and Prejudice is one of my favorite books of all time. And the movie adaptation with Kiera Knightly easily my favorite movie. Of. All. Time. So when I saw a sort of “sequel” written by PD James, I knew it had to go on my Read list.
And since one of my other goals for the year is to spend no extra money, I checked it out a few weeks ago from the library. It didn’t disappoint. Maybe because I already love the characters. But yes, it only took me about a week to really finish it. I always let a book sit it until I can dive in completely undistracted. I want to me completely immersed in it, and I always feel a little sad when I am coming to the end.
Grade: B (because some things were a little predictable)
February’s intention for my one little word was wishing for patience. To go on a time schedule other than my own. To wish for patience is weird, right? You either have it or you don’t. I was not one to naturally be blessed with it, but what I was blessed with was a go-getter attitude. If I want something done, I want it done now (or ASAP anyway) and damn it, if I have to do it myself, that is okay with me.
I am really trying hard to learn to slow down and let things get done when the time is right (or when there is enough time to do them right).
This month, my go-getter attitude sort of mashed with my small sense of patience, and I have to say it worked out pretty well. I was able to look more closely at other people’s ideas and opinions and wants and focus more on the big picture here rather than what is good right now. Because we know that what seems good right now might not be what we need to be doing to get where we want to go.
My OLW project has already turned my word WISH into different meanings and intentions, and while WISH stays consistent, the prompts each month differ so much that it changes pretty drastically.
I am looking forward to March and seeing where my word takes me, teaches me for the rest of this month.
I wasn’t sure just how I was going to do the programs for the wedding, especially since it is going to be a relatively shorter ceremony and we are having a small wedding party. No flower girl, no ring bearer, no ushers or anything like that.
I designed something quick (after a 5-minute rough sketch) to include our parents’ names, bridal party, and officiant. I cut regular white cardstock down to 4.25 x 5.5 inches and pressed print. After nearly 200 of them were printed, I flipped them over and printed one of my favorite quotes on the back. And it fits Greg and I pretty well.
Rounding the corners was my least favorite part of the whole process and the most time-consuming too. I really thought about quitting the rounding halfway through the stack, but of course the inconsistency would have driven me nuts.
I am happy with how they turned out, how expensive they were to make, and how they’ll fit into the other locker basket with the bird seed packets.
I’m doing it. I’m finally gaining the weight that I’ve been trying to. I have been using an app to track my calories, and I’ve been stuffing my face with everything in sight. A lot of bread and fruit snacks at work (those little suckers have calories!). Muscle Milk. Avocados. Peanuts.
But it’s working. Such a good feeling.
I can’t really see any change in my body besides that my thighs look a tiny bit meatier. And that is A-okay with me. I’m going to take it and keep going.
Here’s to 5 more pounds before the wedding!